When you tidy up together

Short answer: Sort your own clothes separately and the shared things together. Nobody should decide for the other, and a joint clear out works best on a day you have agreed in advance.

Your own clothes are your own decision

Decisions about someone else's clothes are rarely well received. The piece that looks worn to you may be the one your partner likes best on a Sunday. Let each person go through their own clothes and decide what stays and what goes. You can help by holding things up, but the choice is theirs. See most popular for men.

Only the wearer knows the value

A piece of clothing can have a value you cannot see from outside. It may fit especially well, be warm on a cold morning or be the only thing that goes with something specific. The wearer knows this, the other person guesses. That is why a decision made for someone else is rarely the right one.

Shared things are decided together

Towels, bed linen, tea towels and blankets belong to both of you and should be reviewed together. Lay everything out on the bed or floor so you can see how much there really is. Often there are far more sets than get used. Agree how many you need and let the rest go.

Three piles keep it manageable

Whether it is your own clothes or shared items, sort into three piles: keep, give away and unsure. The unsure pile goes into a bag that is put away for a couple of months. If nothing has been missed by then, it can go. This makes decisions easier, because nothing has to be settled at once.

Agree on a day rather than acting on impulse

An agreed day gives you both time to take part. When one person starts suddenly on a busy evening, the other feels caught off guard and the job ends half done. Set aside a few hours at a weekend when neither of you has plans. Wear something comfortable, as it often takes longer than expected. See bamboo jogging suit.

Start separately, finish together

A good order is to begin with your own clothes, each in your own corner of the wardrobe. It goes faster when you do not have to negotiate over every piece. Once you are both done, tackle the shared things together. By then you have already made room, and it is easier to see where shared items should go.

Get the bag out of the house the same day

A bag of clothes to give away tends to sit in the hallway for weeks. Take it to a charity shop or collection point the same day, or agree who takes it the next morning. Then the clear out is finished, and what you decided does not get reopened. See bamboo sweatshirt for men.

Once a year is enough

A bigger joint clear out once a year keeps the wardrobe easy to manage. Many do it when the season changes, since the clothes are being moved around anyway. In between, each of you can take out a single piece when it wears out. That keeps the yearly session shorter.

Frequently asked questions

How do you clear out together

Separately for your own clothes and together for the shared things. Nobody should decide what the other person gets rid of.

Why should you not sort through your partner's clothes

Because only the wearer knows the value of a piece. A decision made for someone else is rarely the right one and is often not well received.

When does a joint clear out work best

On an agreed day. An impulse in the middle of a busy week usually ends with half a clear out and a bag left standing in the hallway.